Galloway, N.J. — As the war between Israel and Hamas rages on, it’s difficult to see an end to the conflict. But the status quo is untenable, said Saliba Sarsar, the co-founder, president and CEO of the Jerusalem Peace Initiative.

“Much is at stake and indecision is costly for all concerned,” said Sarsar, who spoke to a group of about 40 Stockton University students, staff and faculty on Feb. 22 during a lecture titled “Pathways to Peace: Discussing Israeli-Palestinian Relations” at the Campus Center Theatre.  “While the obstacles in the way of progress to peace are numerous and real … these must not delay or prevent the search for opportunities and positive outcomes.”

Sarsar, who was born and spent most of his early life in Jerusalem, began his talk with a harrowing story when he was 11 of his Christian family’s escape from the fighting during the 1967 Six-Day War in the Middle East.

His family lived in an all-Palestinian Arab Muslim neighborhood of Jerusalem just a few hundred yards from no-man’s land. When it became time to evacuate and cross the disputed area from east Jerusalem to west Jerusalem, he said he finally met “the enemy,” the Israeli Jews on the other side.

“The enemy we thought for many, many decades,” said Sarsar, now 68. “And the enemy was really within our hearts. The people we met were just like us. They had their own needs, their own loves, their own tears, their own pain. And they were just like us. And then it dawns on you: What is going on? Why did we have to fight all these wars?”

That time as a child shaped a teaching and scholarly career — most recently as a Political Science professor at Monmouth University — focused on Jerusalem, the Middle East, Palestinian-Israeli relations and peacebuilding.

“I’m here to talk about Israeli-Palestinian relations, and not necessarily Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Conflict is just part of those relations,” he said.

However, he did acknowledge the human toll the last five conflicts between Israel and Hamas have taken since 2008. Over that time, more than 33,000 Palestinians and more than 1,200 Israelis have been killed.

“The history of pain and unfulfilled expectations, the casualties, the refugees, the dispossessed, the distrust, the lack of vision and political horizon make peaceful and secure coexistence truly difficult,” he said. “Israelis and Palestinians have become victims of their own exclusive national narratives and are speaking past each other.”

Sarsar said both sides selectively highlight the “rightness” of their own cause, accuse the other side of bad intentions and fail to realize how their own rhetoric and acts can make the situation worse.

“Israelis and Palestinians are neighbors forever. Their present and future are intertwined, whether they acknowledge this reality or not,” he said. “The longer they wait to negotiate, the more complicated the issues become and the less room there will be for a peaceful solution.”

That peaceful solution must come from the creation of two states where Israel and Palestine can live alongside each other in security and prosperity, and the United States must go beyond managing the conflict and take the lead to break the deadlock, Sarsar said.

“Peace necessitates that both Israel and Palestine do their best and judiciously expect less than they hope for,” he said.

He said the United States should urge both sides to discuss the idea of confederation, which introduces important modifications to the classical two-state solution.

“This confederal idea is not to totally separate the two peoples — for example, divorce — but to empower them to cohabitate in the two respective sovereign states,” Sarsar said. “This would allow for greater cooperation and movement between them.”

He said a confederation between Israel and Palestine would have borders that would allow residents to pass through and encourage freedom of movement for goods. It would also include joint political institutions, and the residents of the confederation would feel that they live in one framework.

“I know it is extremely hard to think of the future during tragedy, trauma and hopelessness, but we must try if we want to exit the valley of death,” Sarsar said toward the end of his lecture. “True peace comes to Israelis and Palestinians when they prepare for it.”

During a question-and-answer session after his lecture, Sarsar reiterated the need for new people to be represented at the negotiating table and they need to get involved right now.

“I’m interested in peace not in 50 years, 100 years or 200 years. I’m interested in peace for my children, grandchildren and all the other children of the world,” he said. “But we are not desperate for a man on a white horse. We need to engage the youth. People your age. We need to engage women. But what we’ve had historically is a world of men dictating the terms.

“The Holy Land is not exclusively for one. It is a gift for humanity, just like Jerusalem is. And we need leaders to advocate on both sides of the divide, and we to narrow that divide,” Sarsar said.

The lecture was co-sponsored by the Sara and Sam Schoffer Holocaust Resource Center, the Holocaust and Genocide Studies minor, the Jewish Studies minor and the Historical Studies Program.